Fire Departments and Grades

I secretly hoped that this would become some sort of profound journal filled with inspiration and wisdom... although I've decided that I'm going to settle for a simple chronicle of life here and maybe if something profound slips out then....sweet.
So the test came back and I needlessly worried, I managed quite well. I guess not everyone experienced that, but I do know that I put in the work.

On Tuesdays I go to the local fire department where I volunteer for meetings. It is a unique group and shows pretty "average" people here in Appalachia. However, normal here...is quite abnormal for everywhere else I've been.
Somewhat like in a stereotypical southern movie fashion there is a fireman who isn't terribly bright, in fact, I'm fairly certain that he's mentally retarded, or just REALLY dumb.
But this guy has one goal in life and that's to drive the fire truck. He is obsessed with driving the fire truck. And the truth is, he's retarded and $100,000 worth of truck and 4 other lives... ain't worth his fantasy and basically everyone knows that except for him.
But he is incorrigible, so the other guys let him do little driving tasks such as pulling the truck out of the bays when it needs to be washed etc. He's that guy in the movie, the big dumb one who everyone pretends is capable.
Another fireman there is named Ron, he is younger, shorter but smart and motivated and frequently the one responding to calls.
The other day at the station Ron and Thomas (big guy) were going to check the fuel level in one of the fire trucks. Ron heads to the cab, where Thomas heads to the barrel like gas tank that runs along side of the cab, like you would see in a semi.
Opening the cap at the top of the tank, Thomas dunks his hand into the tank and after looking at his wet knuckles that "she's almost all fulled up there Ron!"
He then proceeds to suck his fingers like they had fallen into a Thanksgiving pie.
"Yup. That there's green diesel. Green as could them there be. That's green diesel it is."
He then goes to wipe his hands off on Ron's head.
"HEY!" shouts Ron, avoiding Thomas' hand.
"Awh, now it ain't gonna hurt you any," explains Thomas "I even had my whole head covered in this here kinda diesel."
My thoughts race back in time to a much younger Thomas, a normal Thomas existed... until that fateful day.
"Oh, but a Ron will hurt you, if you wipe your hands on me," says Ron firmly. I mentally chuckle at his quick comeback.
This is the kind of folks I'm working with. Thomas is something else. He works on methods frequently in a disconnect with the rest of our reality. They mostly center around driving fire trucks and eating pot pies, which thankfully he is at least allowed to do one of those activities.

More stories about fire department life later, sleep for now.

-Ted